Perfection response

Recently a friend of mine wrote a blog entry about how she really appreciates people that are real, that are not afraid to say that their life isn’t perfect, and that can admit that they make mistakes. I want to take this opportunity to say that my life isn’t perfect, my marriage isn’t perfect, my parenting isn’t perfect, our finances aren’t perfect, and I am far from being perfect. I make mistakes daily, and I often lay in bed at night thinking that I am a terrible wife and mother. I try to be better every day, but I often fail miserably. I don’t get everything checked off my to-do list. Laundry sometimes sits in the dryer for 2 days straight. Dishes stay in the sink overnight. The carpet doesn’t get vacuumed for a whole week. Billy’s dress shirts never get ironed. The kids get out of the house with stains on their shirt. I get mad at Billy for relaxing when I know his day was just as hard, if not harder, than mine. I yell at Logan and Taylor for fighting instead of teaching them to share and take turns. I try to encourage Billy to exercise, but I can’t seem to get myself on the treadmill. I try to teach Logan and Taylor to be patient and control their temper when I, more often than not, am impatient and lose my temper.


People who come to our house often ask me how I can be so organized – but they don’t know that I just spent 2 hours making sure that everything was sparking clean before they came over. They comment that I must be super mom for grocery shopping with all 3 of my kids – but they don’t know that I’m probably going to have a melt-down on the drive back home. They say that I look pretty good for having had 3 kids – but they don’t know that the top button of my jeans is undone. They admire the food I cook – but they don’t realize that there is only a handful of meals I feel comfortable serving.

I am far from reaching perfection – and that’s okay. I want my kids to know that I am not perfect, that no one is, and that I make mistakes, just like everyone else. I don’t want them to feel defeated every time they mess up, thinking that they have to be that person everybody wants them to be. I’ve learned from my mistakes, and I am still learning. Every day I try to be better than the day before. Some days I feel like I succeeded, and others I feel like I failed. I hope my kids can look up to me, but I also hope that they can look at my weaknesses and strive to have to those qualities that I lack.

Why have I never shared this before? Because I didn’t want to be that pessimistic person that everybody hates to hear complain. But I’m not being pessimistic – I’m being real with how my life is. And I’m not complaining – I’m okay not having a perfect life. I can’t change my husband. I can’t change my kids. I can’t change our finances. But I can change me. I can change my marriage. I can change my parenting. I can change the way I look at my life. And I can change the way I react to things. I’m still going to try to be better every day. But now I’m also going to try to be more real, because I’ve realized that everyone sometimes needs to hear that they’re not the only person in the world having a bad day. No one is perfect, and no one has a perfect life.

Thank you, Ashley, for helping me to look deep into myself. Thank you for reminding me that my kids are innocent children of God, and that one of the many reasons I married my husband was because he was a better person than me. Thank you for helping me to realize that life isn’t a fairy tale, and that there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. Thank you for admitting that your life isn’t perfect. It makes me feel more okay knowing that mine isn’t either. Thank you.