Trip to the E.R.

This Wednesday, I took my first trip away from Taylor and Logan. My mom watched them while I went to the mall to pick up pants for Billy. While I was waiting, I felt something leaking in my shorts. Fortunately, I was wearing some protection, but when the leaking didn't stop, I realized I wasn't wearing enough protection. On my way out the store, I looked at myself in the mirror and noticed that blood had leaked through my underwear and shorts. I was holding two bags, so I strategically placed one in front of me and one behind me. I hoped no one could see the blood now dripping down my legs. When I got to the car, I took Billy's pants out of the bag so that I could sit on the bag and not get blood all over my seat.
As I was driving home, I remembered my OB/GYN telling me to call him immediately if I bled more than the size of a golf ball. I wasn't exactly sure how much I was bleeding, but I knew I needed to get home right away, even if that meant driving down the highway at 80 mph.
When I got out of the car, the plastic bag stuck to my butt because of the amount of blood I was losing. I walked through the door and my mom said, "Nathalie, you're bleeding! You're having an hemorrhage! You need to lay down right now and call Billy!" I laid down on the carpet while my mom placed a towel underneath me and called Billy. Fortunately, he had had a half day at his rotation and was across the street, at school, studying. But he wasn't picking up his phone. I called again, and he picked it up. I told him I was losing a lot of blood and needed him to come home. Within 2 minutes he was by my side, examining me.
It didn't look like my incision was bleeding, which was great news, but I was definitely losing enough blood to send me to the hospital. Billy picked me up and ran out the door. I was glad mom was there to watch the babies. I don't even know what we would have done if this had happened after my mom had gone home. As we were going out the front door, a neighbor was walking out and walked us to the car, opening the door for us.
When we got to the hospital, a nurse came to meet us with a wheel chair. I sat in it and noticed there was even more blood in Billy's car. The nurse took me right in and another nurse started an IV on me. The E.R. doctor came in within a few minutes and examined me. He told us my uterus and incision were intact. Then he explained us that there had probably been a blood clot keeping my blood from running down little by little. When that clot came down, all the blood that had been accumulated came gushing down. Although it was scary to see so much blood, all my vital signs were fine and there was nothing to worry about. Just to make sure I hadn't lost too much blood, they tested it and found that I wouldn't need a transfusion. I did lose about 1 liter to 1.5 liter, though.
Within three hours, I was home. But in order to prevent an infection of the uterus, my OB/GYN prescribed me some antibiotics, which do pass into my milk. It is apparently safe for babies, but can cause diarrhea. After discussing the situation with Billy, we decided that it wasn't worth taking the risk of giving our babies diarrhea. So I am currently taking the antibiotics (for a week), feeding Logan and Taylor formula, and pumping and dumping my milk. Once a day, I still breasfeed them so that they can get the nutrients from my milk, get skin-on-skin contact, and not forget how to latch on. It sucks, but I want my babies and myself to be safe, whatever it takes. I just can't wait until next Wednesday when I can breatfeed them again, exclusively.